THE PASTOR’S HOME; EXPECTATIONS, CHALLENGES AND WAY FORWARD
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Abstract
The study sought to examine the pastor’s home; expectations, challenges and way forward in Nigeria. The study intends to examine the rights and duties of pastors regarding religious and moral upbringing of their families. Most pastor’s families have extremely high expectations of themselves and often criticize themselves when they fail to meet those goals. Pastor’s children grow up in a culture that asks far too much of them; many pastor’s children feel compelled to act like polished saints or seasoned disciples. They are not meant to get upset with church members who criticize their parents or raise misgivings in Sunday school class. This means that pastor’s children feel the need to live up to unrealistic perfection standards and believe they are held to a higher level than their classmates. It was discovered that the church expects the pastor’s family to be involved in pastoral duties. The study also indicated that pastors are frequently expected to participate in and lead a variety of activities. Administrative tasks, visiting, committee memberships, teaching, crisis management, worship and study leadership, service and event organization, preaching, discipline, evangelistic, and counselling are examples of such activities. They may also be expected to be church growth specialists, skilled communicators with people of all ages, and community leaders. And if a pastor falls short in one of the aforementioned tasks, the church leadership and members consider him unsuited for the pastoral duty. As a result, many ministries and callings that would have been a source of growth for the church and God’s vision for the church have been destroyed. It was concluded that it takes God’s grace for a pastor to combine both the duties of father in the home and the head in the church successfully without crisis. The report suggests, among other things, that church leaders try to organize pastors’ off days or take a little vacation to spend quality time with their spouses and families.
Table of Contents
Title Page i
Certification ii
Dedication iii
Acknowledgement iv
Abstract v
Table of Contents vi
CHAPTER ONE: – INTRODUCTION
1.1. Background of Studies
1.2. Statement of Problems
1.3. Objectives of Study
1.4. Significant of the Study
1.5. Scope of the Study
1.6. Limitation of the Study
1.7. Definition of Terms
Endnotes
CHAPTER TWO – LITERATURE REVIEW
2.1 Defining the Term “Pastor”
2.3 Concept of “Family/home”
2.4 The Pastor’s Family
2.5 The Church and the Gospel on Pastor’s home
2.6 The Pastor and members of the Family
Endnotes
CHAPTER THREE – THE PASTOR’S HOME AND THE EXPECTATIONS
3.1 The Biblical Model for Family
3.2 The Biblical Model for the Pastoral office
3.3. The Societal demands on the pastoral calling
3.4. The Impact of the Pastoral Office on the Pastor’s home.
Endnotes
CHAPTER FOUR: -PASTORS HOME, EXPECTATION, CHALLENGES AND WAY FORWARD
4.1 The Pastor’s Home and its Challenges
4.2 Balancing between Family life and the Ministry
4.3 Way forward to the challenges in the Pastor’s Home and Ministry
Endnotes
CHAPTER FIVE: – SUMMARY, CONCLUSION AND RECOMMENDATION
5.1 Summary
5.2. Conclusion
5.3 Recommendation
Endnotes
Bibliography
CHAPTER ONE
INTRODUCTION
1.1. Background of the Study
Each of us should determine with God’s help to be the best in whatever we are. Some pastors have stressed one or more of their relationship with members and their family. But God expects from us “reasonable service,” and there should be no conflict in our relationships and duties. When we allow conflicts to arise it is because we have our priorities confused. Now, let us consider the pastor’s relationships to his wife and family.” A pastor has a family. Sometimes the congregation forgets. Sometimes, even the pastor seems to forget. If the pastor is single, relatives and close friends are the family. Each member of that family–as each member of your family–has needs to be met and potentials to be developed. Peter preached, recalling Genesis and God’s promise to Abraham, “In your descendants all the families of the earth shall be blessed” (Acts 3:25). So we become one family in Christ, caring for every member of the body. Sometimes a pastor’s family may feel that the church members are the pastor’s family, because they seem to have more impact on the pastor.1
Whenever they call, whatever they want, the pastor seems to be ready to counsel, teach, preach and visit, because pastors care about what they do. It is often difficult for them to turn people away who crowd into family time2. More and more pastors, however, are scheduling regular time away from their pastoral duties for their families in addition to time for themselves. There are great rewards in the pastor’s home. Children have access to a parent at times other children can’t reach theirs. They understand what their parent, who is a pastor, does more clearly than children whose parents “go to the work.” But there may be a sense of intrusion, especially when the pastor’s family lives in a parsonage. To fulfill its meaning and purpose, a family: Brings love and support, influences lifestyle, and faces daily problems and opportunities for growth. To be strong, a family must have members who provide love and support for continuity to those they love, make room for other family members, give the time and concern necessary to work out problems and grow as a family member. It is the task of this paper to therefore look at what informs the society’s expectation of what pastors’ family ought to be and what are the factors that ultimately affects pastor’s family conduct or behaviour positively or negatively. The research then looks at the building blocks for developing ethical life and conduct in pastors’ family. It is the position of this research that if the right physical and spiritual conditions are put in place and the pastor and his or her family understand what should be the ethical standards for their conduct, pastor’s family will live a life that is more pleasing to God and exemplary in the society, thereby uplifting the ministry of their parents and not pulling it down.
1.2 Statement of Problem
Pastors carry out the moral-religious education of children by praying together as a family, taking children to the Church to receive sacraments of Christian initiation, allowing them also to attend Sunday Masses/ Services and also allowing them to join church movements and others.
The expectations in the pastor’s home, challenges can be analysed below:
- They take children courses at the Church and prepare the children for other Church programmes.
- Also, the study will look at why so many pastors struggle to balance the call to faithfully shepherd the church with the call to care for their wives and children?
- This study attempts to answer this pastoral and practical question solely from the perspective of male pastors. It is concluded that the cause of the struggle is the sinful tendency of pastors who prioritize the church over the family and that it is possible for pastors to find a balance between these two holy duties by undertaking two practices: (a) repentance of the tendency embedded in sinful nature, and (b) being more attentive to the priority of shepherding their families while faithfully serving the church.
1.3 Objectives of the Study
The major purpose of this study is to examine the pastor’s home, expectations, challenges and way forward to the problems they face. Other general objectives of the study are:
- To examine the rights and duties of pastors regarding religious and moral upbringing of their families.
- To examine the relationship between the church minister and his family leadership
- To find out the challenges faced by church ministers in the religious moral upbringing of family and how they can be solved
- To check out for possible solution and a way out of the problem faced by the pastor and his family.
1.4 Significance of the Study
The greatest challenge facing the church minister is that of managing the ministry and his family. Therefore, this study is set to give insight into the various expectations of the role of the pastor that are present in twentieth century parishes, both urban and rural. It is also significant in helping those that are accepting calls to either urban or rural agrarian parishes to understand, before beginning ministry, some of the role expectations with which they may have to contend. Moral upbringing of a family is not a simple task and it is erected by a complex set of factors, not all of which can be controlled by the church. This research work seeks to study church minister and the challenges of moral upbringing of his family. Though pastors’ do concentrate on the ministry work more than their families, there is need for them to manage their work well so as to have time for their families.
1.5 SCOPE OF THE STUDY
The study is based on the Pastor’s home, expectation, challenges and way forward to every challenges faced in the Pastor’s home.
1.6 Limitation of Study
Financial constraint- Insufficient fund tends to impede the deficiency of the researcher in sourcing for the relevant materials, literature or information and in the process of data collection (internet, questionnaire and interview). Time constraint- The researcher will simultaneously engage in this study with other academic work. This consequently will cut down on the time devoted for the research work.
1.7 Definition of Terms
Pastor: A pastor is a minister in charge of a Christian church or congregation, especially in some non-episcopal churches.
Home: A home is the place where one lives permanently, especially as a member of a family or household.
Expectation: Expectation is a strong belief that something will happen or be the case.
Challenges: Challenges is a task or situation that tests someone’s abilities.
Way: Way is defined as a manner or method of doing or happening.
Forward: Forward is defined as moving, tending, or leading toward a position in front.
Endnotes
- Williams C. Neece, “The Pastor and His Family” (James Fleming Publication, 2005), 1.
- Turner N. Clinard, “Responding to God” (Philadelphia: The Westminster Press, 1980), 25.
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